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Turns out it was working, just REALLY slow. I opened the log in SublimeText, which can be set to update files as they change. I watched it add 5-10 lines a minute, minute after minute. Finally, a half hour later, it finished loading. I updated the few addons that needed it, and it worked normally. And it's still working normally now. First time I've ever see that happen. Next big patch, I'll be a little more patient.
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